Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Quick, to the slutcave!
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I supernannyed him into submission
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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