We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
