She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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