My balls are so social today.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
