you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
