i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
