I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Randomize
