Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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