like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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