Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
