VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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