Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
