I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Randomize
