how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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