There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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