Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
