You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize