So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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