ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just cropdusted the office
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
