also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize