Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
