don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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