i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize