See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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