hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize
