she was so not down for the gang bang
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
