we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Someone came in the potted fern
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
