my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
