hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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