I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Girls should come with a carfax report
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
vagina is talking i cant
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize