i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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