Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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