So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
