It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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