babies were throwing up all over the place
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
