I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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