Im at strip club and am horny
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Randomize
