It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
