READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
