? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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