dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
