just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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