Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
