this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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