before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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