it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
