There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
