we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
what is it with giant penises always finding me
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
