he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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