she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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